“But if a widow has children or grandchildren, let them first learn to show godliness to their own household and to make some return to their parents, for this is pleasing in the sight of God.”
—1 Timothy 5:4
Caring for elderly parents is a growing reality for many adults today. Recently, I reconnected with a college friend who, like me, is in her sixties and caring for her elderly mother. She shared how she and her husband brought her mother, a widow in declining health, into their home. What they thought would be a brief season of care has stretched into years, altering their plans for retirement and ministry.
She loves her mom, but the weight of caregiving—the demands on time, finances, space, and emotions—can feel overwhelming. This is a familiar story for many, as the ranks of the elderly grow. While society may seek solutions in programs, facilities, or healthcare, for Christians, this challenge is also an opportunity: a chance to honor God by honoring our parents.
How can we prepare ourselves and others in the church to embrace this God-given call? Here are three principles for adult children navigating the path of honoring aging parents.
1. Look Ahead
Modern culture often avoids the realities of aging and death. Advertisements promise vitality, endless security, and eternal youth, leaving little room for the truth of old age. Yet, Scripture calls us to see the full picture.
We must engage with the elderly in our churches and communities—visiting retirement homes, listening to their stories, and learning from their wisdom. By doing so, we teach younger generations to honor their elders and understand the beauty of God’s generational design (Exodus 20:12; Leviticus 19:32; Psalm 78:4).
While aging and death are painful consequences of sin’s curse, they also point us to the gospel’s hope. Jesus Christ bore sin’s punishment on the cross and conquered death, offering eternal life to all who believe in him. This hope gives us strength to face the challenges of aging—with our parents and ourselves—with faith and trust in God’s promises.
So, look ahead. Acknowledge the reality of aging and death as part of God’s redemptive story, and plan for the future with eyes fixed on the hope of the gospel.
2. Arm Yourself
Caring for aging parents is not a dramatic act of heroism but a long, quiet battle—often unseen and uncelebrated. It involves patience, sacrifice, and steadfast faith in the face of ongoing challenges.
To endure, we need spiritual armor. Regular participation in worship, prayer, Bible study, and fellowship equips us to walk this path faithfully. God provides the strength we need through his Word, his Spirit, and his people.
For me, corporate worship and weekly Bible study fortify my heart as I care for my 98-year-old mom. The prayers of my church family sustain me, and Scripture feeds my soul. These ordinary means of grace empower us for both the grand and mundane moments of caregiving, reminding us that our service is offered in the name of Christ.
Prepare yourself. Seek God’s strength daily and embrace the long battle with perseverance, knowing that his grace is sufficient.
3. Get Down
Caring for elderly parents is not martyrdom; it is obedience. God calls us to honor our parents, and doing so pleases him (1 Timothy 5:4).
As adults, we easily forget that we were once helpless, dependent children, cared for at great cost by our parents. Caring for them in their later years is a way to reflect God’s love and faithfulness. Just as Christ humbled himself to serve us, we humble ourselves to serve our parents, pointing them to the One who carries his people from the womb to gray hairs (Isaiah 46:4).
These moments of caregiving, though seemingly ordinary, hold eternal significance. We often stand at the threshold of eternity as we care for aging loved ones, reminding us of life’s brevity and teaching us to number our days (Psalm 90:12).
So, get low. Embrace this humbling call and experience the blessings of serving others for the glory of God.
A Sacred Opportunity
Caring for aging parents is not just a duty; it is a sacred opportunity to honor God, grow in humility, and point others to the gospel’s hope. Look ahead with faith, arm yourself with God’s Word and grace, and get low in loving service. In doing so, you will not only honor your parents but also bring glory to your heavenly Father.
